1991 Oldsmobile Cutlass Car Won't Start

We recently aquired a '91 Cutlass Supreme for Our Sons 16th B-Day. It had/has some issues but made the 210mile trip home with no problems. After fixing a PS leak, it wouldnt start.
I found gas in the intake tube between the throttle body and air-box. I traced it back to a ruptured fuel pressure regulator. After replacing it, still wouldnt start.
Not having a spark tester I connected my timing light and cranked it over while pulling the triger. Seemingly no spark, but not 100% sure.
None of the fuses were/are blown, there is fuel pressure, no codes from the computer.
Durring the 2day ordeal, it has fired a total of 3 seperate times but not started. Just a one plug fire while cranking.
Now the REAL confusing part! The chassis and engine were randomly electrified. Giving a short 'pinch' shock from the intake, a bracket, shock tower, etc. No fuses blowing, no dimming lights, or any adverse effects. After pulling the battery and charging it all night, the car is no longer 'charged'. It happened with the key on or off but I don't know if it happened durring cranking. I dont know if that is relevent or just odd or just a fluke!
I am at the end of my abilities with the tools I have at my disposal.

Any and all help would be GREATLY appriciated. If I cant get this resolved at Home, I will be taking it in to a 'Profesional' in about a week or two.

TIA

Matt